Relationships and cheating go together all the time it seems. Perhaps your friend is miserable because he has had someone cheat on him. Maybe you are the one that has been cheated on. Or, was it you that was doing the cheating?
Cheating is a painful business. It definitely hurts the person who has been cheated on, the betrayal of trust; and also it hurts the cheater. The cheater has to hide what he is doing, he has to lie about his behaviors, and he has to feel the guilt that inevitably accompanies cheating.
The guilt may not be obvious to you, but inside they will feel guilty. When these relationships and cheating does go hand in hand, it does not mean the relationship has to end.
You’ve been in a relationship and you’ve been cheated on, and you’ve gotten back together or you’ve never broken up. Can you really make it work now that the other person has cheated? How do you get over it? Will he cheat again?
It’s not easy to save these relationships, and cheating is something that can sometimes happen more than once. But if you can truly rebuild your trust in the other person, then you can stay together and be happy.
Why did the person cheat on you? It is very important to think about this, because this may indicate whether you will be able to trust them not to cheat on you again. How were things in your relationship, where they not too good, or was it just convenient or one of those things that “just happened”? You will need to have calm conversations about these reasons.
If the reasons turn out to be things like he or she was simply bored that day and the opportunity came along, then you may have problems. If the other person can give no better reasons for hurting you that way, you may want to consider whether you really can forgive them to be happy. It won’t be easy.
If things were not great in your relationship and there were problems, the other person may have thought the relationship was going to end. If they felt ignored, or undervalued, this might have lead to them cheating. Not to give them an excuse here – there is no excuse for cheating. But if you can understand what was going on at the time you can maybe work on the problems together.
Relationships and cheating are an odd mix; some couples can move on and get over infidelity. Sadly, some couples find the person who has been cheated on cannot get over it. If that is the case, staying in a relationship with no trust, when one person worries and fears that the other will cheat again – this is a miserable thing to do.
The constant suspicions can make you miserable, and can make the other person feel under a microscope 24/7. You have to decide to trust the person not to hurt you again, and let go of the fear even though it can be very hard to do in relationships and cheating situations. If you feel that your partner is cheating again, then you need to find out for sure and put your own mind at rest, either way.
